I recently purchased IW's Astronomical Clock. I wouldn't say it was a dream dress of mine, but it is one I have always wanted to own. If I am being honest, I probably could have gotten a better price if I had just been a bit more patient. When it arrived, I was thrilled and I felt really excited about the outfits I could make with this dress. But there was also this sense of dread, and I notice I feel it with almost every large purchase I make, even now. Seeing a large chunk of money go out of my bank account for just one item always stings, even when I can afford it. And when a friend asked me how much I spent on it, I felt almost too embarrassed to say. I suppose I could say that I almost felt selfish for spending the money, especially when such a purchase would have been too irresponsible for me just a few years ago.
But I keep trying to tell myself that I need to get over my Buyer's Guilt. I am not the same person I was a few years ago. I even try to justify my purchases now, in an attempt to feel a bit less guilty. Here is a list of stuff I try to ask myself-
1. Have I allowed for all of my monthly money outgoings such as bills, medication etc?
2. Am I still maintaining a good social life and seeing my friends, despite my purchases?
3. Have I allowed for any upcoming events, such as a friend's birthday or family occasion?
4. Have I left some money aside, in case of an emergency?
5. Did I get a good deal or did I just go for a higher priced listing for convenience?
6. Is it something I really wanted? Was it on my wishlist or something I just got on a whim?
7. Was the item as described and if it wasn't, did I attempt to get some of my money back?
8. Does the purchase fit my current wardrobe? Can I put outfits together with it using what I already have?
9. How did you feel about the item with it arrived?
10. Am I going to wear my new purchase often?
11. Could I get a decent price if I decided to re-sell it?
I know that deep down my new IW dress was worth it and I have been reasonably responsible. I will never be one of those lolitas who buys every bloodbath release and owns every dress in multiple colours, even if I could afford to. Once I get over the initial guilt, I find that I enjoy my wardrobe and I think that at the moment my wardrobe is a good size for how much I actually wear lolita. I have noticed that I am more picky about what goes on my wishlist too. I think a lot of this comes with time and the longer you are in to lolita, the more you get to know what you really like and want. The more I like something, the less I feel guilty about buying it. So expect to see me wearing my new dress with pride some time in the near future!